Order of the Golden Sprout The New Robert Rankin Fan Club

How will you contrive to be in the bar when you're given an award?

I assume they have another chap ready to award "best novel", as it'd look odd to present it to yourself

I used to work for a company that did the mailsort for this magazine

Can't wait! Just the tonic for the post Christmas blues! I even have a costume idea for the party, and no, it has nothing to do with doctors or zombies!

I've read it a few times - it's mostly dull but occasionally has interesting historical features.

I'm not expecting any awards, but I will be begging all those present to give me one next year (it worked last time!)
Perhaps if I was a Freemason I'd get an award every year.
But do come along if you can, I am going to get the lovely wife to glam up big time as my assistent and make a real Holllywood show of it.
I bet they'll never ask me again!

But it is sure to be a night to remember - so glad I am now coming along Just stay out of the bar Robert